Carole Robin spent over 20 years teaching the Stanford Graduate School of Business course Interpersonal Dynamics, affectionately known as “Touchy Feely.” After leaving Stanford, she founded a nonprofit called Leaders in Tech, which applies the Touchy Feely principles to help Silicon Valley executives build their leadership and interpersonal skills. Carole co-authored the popular book Connect: Building Exceptional Relationships with Family, Friends, and Colleagues, which shares key insights from her decades of teaching these courses. In our conversation, we discuss: • The benefits of building robust relationships, in life and work • The 15% rule, and how it will help you build better relationships • The power of vulnerability • Examples of how to practice vulnerability • Why mental models you build early in life hold you back later • The “three realities” and “the net” • The art of inquiry • Practical tips for avoiding defensiveness when getting feedback • The impact of long Covid on Carole’s life — Brought to you by: • Eppo—Run reliable, impactful experiments • CommandBar—AI-powered user assistance for modern products and impatient users • The a16z Podcast—Featuring conversations with the founders and technologists shaping our future — Find the transcript at: lennysnewsletter.com/p/build-ro… — Where to find Carole Robin: • LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/carole-robin • Email: carolerobinllc@gmail.com — Where to find Lenny: • Newsletter: lennysnewsletter.com • X: twitter.com/lennysan • LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/lennyrachitsky — In this episode, we cover: — Referenced: • How to Build Better Relationships: • Connect: Building Exceptional Relationships with Family, Friends, and Colleagues: • Leaders in Tech: • Leaders in Tech Fellows: • Steve Jobs: • Sheryl Sandberg on X: • Ursula Burns: • Application for Leaders in Tech: • Vygotsky’s Zone of Proximal Development and Scaffolding Theory: • The Best Leaders Aren’t Afraid to Be Vulnerable: • The Surprising Benefits of Admitting Mistakes: 5 Ways to Build Intellectual Humility: • How to Build Conflict Skills—The Pinch/Crunch Model: • Slides mentioned (The Three Realities Framework | The 15% Rule | Feedback Guidelines): • Mindset: The New Psychology of Success: • Management Time: Who’s Got the Monkey?: • Long COVID: major findings, mechanisms and recommendations: • Leadership, acceptance, and self-management: my journey with long COVID: — Production and marketing by . For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email podcast@lennyrachitsky.com. — Lenny may be an investor in the companies discussed.